[Vignette] NANA: Just Ren and Nana
Apr. 19th, 2006 02:02 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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inkcanvasFandom: NANA
Characters: Ren/Nana, Oosaki Nana POV
Rating/Status: G / 625 words, complete
Timeline: Some time after Nana moves to Tokyo, and BLAST forms anew. Exactly when is a bit murky, but no spoilers for any specific bits.
Summary: All she ever wanted was to be just Ren and Nana, without parenthesis.
Author's Notes: Written on a whim for the 04/18/2006 challenge, "(in parenthesis)" at![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
31_days. It was my first attempt at writing a NANA fic - quite unplanned but it popped up out of the nowhere the moment I saw the theme, which resulted in super speed writing all in one go at the last few minutes of the theme day.
Just Ren and Nana
It was not something Oosaki Nana openly shared with others. But it was there, nonetheless, her feeling of worthlessness.
Nobuo used to often reprimand her for having too much pride, but what did he know? All her life, there was always something that came attached to her name, hanging over her head like a wraith of half-truths and lies.
(The girl who was abandoned by her mother.)
(The girl who sold her body for money.)
(The girl who got expelled and killed her grandmother with shame.)
Perhaps it was laughable, maybe even foolish. What kind of pride could someone like her have? Yet, her pride was hers alone - the only thing she had left. The only thing she could still hang onto anymore.
.
They once asked her, if it was so terrible, being just Ren's girlfriend. She certainly loved him enough.
But they wouldn't understand and she would never explain, because being known as Ren's girlfriend was the one thing she hated most.
Honjou Ren (Trapnest's lead guitarist) and his girlfriend (Oosaki Nana).
It was ironic in a way.
Being with Ren was the only thing she had ever truly wanted.
.
More and more, she knew they looked at her and wondered if she might have done things differently had she known how it was all going to turn out. But that way always led to a dead end, because she also knew, better than anyone else, that nothing could have changed.
It wasn't her who left.
(The girl who sang for Ren's old band.)
Instead, all that remained was a chain yanking her forward, with a key that didn't manage to lock anything but the past.
No, it had never been her choice to begin with.
.
Sometimes, the depth of her resentment scared her. It was like a disease that grew and grew, strangling and smothering the breath out of her. The more famous he became, the deeper it burrowed.
A better person could have found a way to be happy for him. A less prideful person may have let it go.
But she was neither of those.
For her, his fame had only ever meant one thing, only ever told one tale. And the bigger it got, the more she couldn't forget.
Because, how does one go about forgetting a reminder?
(The girl Ren left behind.)
He was stolen from her, and she didn't think she could ever learn how to be happy for that. It frightened her all the same, this single-minded need to surpass Trapnest at all cost.
When had their love stopped being enough?
.
Meeting Ren, loving him, being loved by him... he was like a beacon shining so brightly that gravitating towards him was the only natural thing to do. Blindingly sharp but beautiful, it had filled her with a kind of warmth that was almost equally painful. It was strange, in hindsight, why the possibility had never occurred to her - why she had never considered that he wouldn't always be by her side.
The day he got on that train, the light left with him, and a trail of darkness sped towards Tokyo like a tunnel beckoning her to follow.
Ren's girlfriend (Oosaki Nana).
There was only ever one path left that she could have taken.
There was only ever one place she could shine with him.
Not in the shadows, and not in his parenthesis. But on the stage. Bright, standing firmly on her own, next to him like how they were always supposed to be.
.
They said she chose her pride over her happiness as a woman, but to her, they were one and the same.
Ren and Nana.
Without parenthesis. In the end, that was all she wanted.
Just like Sid and Nancy.
/End
Comments and concrit always appreciated. :)
[Cleaned up and revised: 01/28/2012]
* Why did this entry's order go out of wack after editing?
Characters: Ren/Nana, Oosaki Nana POV
Rating/Status: G / 625 words, complete
Timeline: Some time after Nana moves to Tokyo, and BLAST forms anew. Exactly when is a bit murky, but no spoilers for any specific bits.
Summary: All she ever wanted was to be just Ren and Nana, without parenthesis.
Author's Notes: Written on a whim for the 04/18/2006 challenge, "(in parenthesis)" at
31_days. It was my first attempt at writing a NANA fic - quite unplanned but it popped up out of the nowhere the moment I saw the theme, which resulted in super speed writing all in one go at the last few minutes of the theme day.It was not something Oosaki Nana openly shared with others. But it was there, nonetheless, her feeling of worthlessness.
Nobuo used to often reprimand her for having too much pride, but what did he know? All her life, there was always something that came attached to her name, hanging over her head like a wraith of half-truths and lies.
(The girl who was abandoned by her mother.)
(The girl who sold her body for money.)
(The girl who got expelled and killed her grandmother with shame.)
Perhaps it was laughable, maybe even foolish. What kind of pride could someone like her have? Yet, her pride was hers alone - the only thing she had left. The only thing she could still hang onto anymore.
.
They once asked her, if it was so terrible, being just Ren's girlfriend. She certainly loved him enough.
But they wouldn't understand and she would never explain, because being known as Ren's girlfriend was the one thing she hated most.
Honjou Ren (Trapnest's lead guitarist) and his girlfriend (Oosaki Nana).
It was ironic in a way.
Being with Ren was the only thing she had ever truly wanted.
.
More and more, she knew they looked at her and wondered if she might have done things differently had she known how it was all going to turn out. But that way always led to a dead end, because she also knew, better than anyone else, that nothing could have changed.
It wasn't her who left.
(The girl who sang for Ren's old band.)
Instead, all that remained was a chain yanking her forward, with a key that didn't manage to lock anything but the past.
No, it had never been her choice to begin with.
.
Sometimes, the depth of her resentment scared her. It was like a disease that grew and grew, strangling and smothering the breath out of her. The more famous he became, the deeper it burrowed.
A better person could have found a way to be happy for him. A less prideful person may have let it go.
But she was neither of those.
For her, his fame had only ever meant one thing, only ever told one tale. And the bigger it got, the more she couldn't forget.
Because, how does one go about forgetting a reminder?
(The girl Ren left behind.)
He was stolen from her, and she didn't think she could ever learn how to be happy for that. It frightened her all the same, this single-minded need to surpass Trapnest at all cost.
When had their love stopped being enough?
.
Meeting Ren, loving him, being loved by him... he was like a beacon shining so brightly that gravitating towards him was the only natural thing to do. Blindingly sharp but beautiful, it had filled her with a kind of warmth that was almost equally painful. It was strange, in hindsight, why the possibility had never occurred to her - why she had never considered that he wouldn't always be by her side.
The day he got on that train, the light left with him, and a trail of darkness sped towards Tokyo like a tunnel beckoning her to follow.
Ren's girlfriend (Oosaki Nana).
There was only ever one path left that she could have taken.
There was only ever one place she could shine with him.
Not in the shadows, and not in his parenthesis. But on the stage. Bright, standing firmly on her own, next to him like how they were always supposed to be.
.
They said she chose her pride over her happiness as a woman, but to her, they were one and the same.
Ren and Nana.
Without parenthesis. In the end, that was all she wanted.
Just like Sid and Nancy.
/End
Comments and concrit always appreciated. :)
[Cleaned up and revised: 01/28/2012]
* Why did this entry's order go out of wack after editing?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: April 18th, 2006 09:34 pm (UTC)All in all, though, I liked it. :)
no subject
Date: April 19th, 2006 01:04 pm (UTC)Btw...I love your icon- yay for Snape/Hermione! :DD
no subject
Date: April 20th, 2006 12:40 am (UTC)Thank you for the icon love. :)
no subject
Date: April 18th, 2006 11:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: April 19th, 2006 01:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: April 20th, 2006 03:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: April 20th, 2006 08:10 am (UTC)Which spoilers did you read? And you already know I don't particularly care too much about spoilers (especially with NANA)...lol. You've read up to what takoyakis release right?
no subject
Date: April 19th, 2006 12:04 am (UTC)Very nicely written, I enjoyed reading it, and your portrayal of Nana was pretty IC. ^_^
no subject
Date: April 19th, 2006 01:12 pm (UTC)Thank you very much for taking the time to read this and also for the compliment on it. :) I'm really glad you enjoyed it even though it was very short and lack any real plot. ^^;
no subject
Date: November 29th, 2006 12:39 pm (UTC)